Everything just seems so very wrong right now. It's a painful mix of feelings. As Alex said, I have too many emotions. I love that quality only when I get 10x happier than the average person would over something, but when the times are rough---it is too much.

I'm still not over Chris and Ellen leaving. It hurts a lot just thinking about it. I've had friends leave me before, but this is different. They are on the other side of the world. I've don't know if I have ever become so close to someone in just a week. It feels as though I've lost one of my closest friends. Why didn't it ever hurt this much before? It's weird. I can't explain. It just feels like a bond that I can't recreate with anyone else. There is this empty feeling.

--to be continued

Feelings: sad, hopeless, scared, stupid
When you act like everything is all right, but your true feelings cloak your body and you can't help but feel it lingering all the time.